The Baby Has Been Born

Not literally, since I'm not pregnant, nor do I plan on getting pregnant anytime in the near future. No the baby I'm refering to is the book I've been working on for about 7 weeks give or take. It's been a struggle to say the least. I ran into several brick walls, had to "study" for and take finals, and sometimes just didn't want to write, but I finished it. I'm not sure if it's even any good, but it's done.

Now onto the fun part EDITING!!! Yeah not really excited for it, but it has to be done. Plus now I can start on my next project, which I'm really excited for.

I don't have a name for it yet, but here is the first blurb from the book. Hope you enjoy it.
Chapter One
There was something about the beach that set Katy Ferris at ease. Whether it was the waves softly splashing, the soft sand against her skin, or the sound of squelching birds over the bay, she couldn’t pin point it. It had been one of her favorite places to go when she couldn’t handle home any longer. There was nothing more beautiful to her than a sunset over the black water.
She stared over the water, her hands shoved in the pockets of her skinny blue jeans. A slight breeze scuttled over the water, ruffling her loose brown curls. The beach was completely deserted, just the way she liked it. She replayed scenes over and over in her head. His smile in the sun, his laugh, the glint in his eyes-it was all imprinted in her mind like a tattoo.
“I thought I’d find you here.” She turned to the voice, wiping her tears away with the back of her hand. “Are you okay?”
“I don’t think so,” Katy sniffled, turning to her best friend, Molly. Without missing a beat Molly took her in a hug and let her cry. “I didn’t think it would be this hard.”
“Oh Katy, it will get better,” Molly soothed as she gently rubbed Katy’s back. “Funerals always suck.”
“Tell me about it,” Katy tried to laugh, pulling away from Molly. It sounded more like a choke and didn’t feel right to her. “I never thought this would happen. We were supposed to be together forever.”

**Rachael Marie

Game Over!!!

Hey Peeps!!!

Like every other college kid out there, it's been finals week. Some have pulled their hair out, screamed, cried, or yelled during their first finals experience. I'm proud to say that all my hair is still attached to my head, I haven't screamed at anyone, no tears were shed (well at least not over the exams) and I didn't even swear over the tests. I survived and am proud to report I have finished my 1st college semester with a "B" average.

It's strange that I'm proud of that though. In Junior High and High School I was obsessed with my grades for the most part. If it wasn't an "A" in everything but math (I'm not a math girl so I was happy to take a "B" or even a "C"). I did extra credit just to do it and became a sort of teachers pet in some classes. That was just who I was. I loved school and couldn't understand why some did poorly (I still don't, but whatev). Being in college has changed my personal perspective slightly. In college most of your grade comes from exams because there aren't "filler" assignments to boost your grade. I've never been a great test taker and even struggle with test anxiety. Everything considered, I am proud of my "B" average!! I'm receiving credit for all my classes have even learned a few study tricks that work for me.

I'm glad to be done with my 1st semester. Is it common for freshman to have a bout of "senioritis"?? I know I did. Near the end I wasn't sure if I was going to be able to learn anything more. But I made it and I'm done!! It's time for new classes!!

I have a 3 week break to fill, and filled it's going to be. I was able to get my job back at Syracuse Family Fun Center and I'm going to be working like crazy, which is good because textbooks are expensive!! I'm going to be there a lot, so if you're looking for some fun, come visit me there!! I'm so grateful that I left on good terms over the summer and am able to come back and work the break. I'm going to stay on and help out on some weekends until school is done for the summer. Best part of all, I'm back to doing birthday parties!! I loved doing birthday parties when I worked there. Seeing a little kid's face light up with excitement is one of the best feelings in the world.

It's going to be a busy break with work and maybe a trip or two to Logan...let the fun begin!!! But for tonight it’s good night!!!

**Rachael Marie

Finals Week

It's finals week here in Logan...and everyone seems to be stressing except me. I don't know what it is, but I'm not worried about finals. I've gone to class all semester and done my homework and reading. I'm going over my notes, but I'm not feeling overwhelmed by the task. Yes I am nervous for my exams, but everyone with test anxiety is. I'm not panicking though. I feel ready.

The main purpose for tonights post is just to share the quote below. I found it online, stumbled upon it actually. I think it's so true and really fits some of the thoughts in my head right now. I'm not sure who spoke it, but it's perfect.

Quote of the Day: "You may not be his first, his last, or his only. He loved before and he may love again. But if he loves you now, what else matters? He's not perfect-you aren't either and the two of you may never be perfect together, but if he can make you laugh, cause you to think twice, and admit to being human and making mistakes, hold onto him and give him the most you can. He may not be thinking of you every second of the day but he will give you a part of him that he knows you can break-his heart. So don't hurt him, don't change him, don't analyze and don't expect more than he can give. Smile when he makes you happy, let him know when he makes you mad, and miss him when he's not there."

**Rachael Marie

A few LONG Thoughts

It's been a week since I last posted, so I figured it was time to resurface. Finals are next week and I'm trying to study for them. It's a lot harder than I thought. I feel like I haven't learned anything this semester and I'm not sure what to study. It's like everything I learned in high school about studying has gone out the window. Hopefully I'll do well...and then off to a blissful three week break without homework!! Well not the school kind. I plan to spend my Christmas break editing!! (Hey it's a writers dream!) I've been working on a book for about a month and it's not finished yet, but it's almost there. I know what is going to happen; I just need to write it. Once it's finished I get to edit and make sure it's what I want. Once that's done comes the scary part...sending it to agents. I'm sick of dreaming of being published. I'm finally old enough to be taken seriously and I think that I could make it. So it's time to try.

With a semester of college almost behind me, I've realized I've grown up. Last year high school sucked for me. I felt like I had no friends, I was hurt on the inside by a boy and people I thought were my friends. I really didn't think that life could be worse. Being in college where the stupid girl drama isn't there (but yes there is still a bit of boy confusion...but I'm coming to the conclusion that confusion is just part of what makes them male) has been so freeing. It's like "So what? You're a b, fine. There's enough people on this campus that I don't have to see you if I don't want to." I can be me and thankfully I'm around others who love and accept me. I won't lie though, sometimes, seeing things on fb or old photos opens up the wounds again and I have to find a new band aid and remind myself that I am so much better than the person I was. I have dreams and plans and I’m not going to let anyone take those from me just because some stupid person wants to be mean.

Have girls always been so mean?? Lately on fb I've noticed several posts from young girls in jr high and high school and they sound similar to things I thought last year. Is the problem getting worse or am I just noticing it more because I know the signs?? One thing I do know is that parents need to recognize them as well. I commented on a status a few days ago and someone's response was along the lines of "you're kid just needs to toughen up". Um excuse me, it doesn't matter how many times you quote "Sticks and stones will break my bones but words can never hurt me", words are still a silent sword. Their wounds are the worst to heal and last the longest. Telling your kid to toughen up isn't going to take away the hurt they feel when they are left standing alone!! This whole topic is such a big one for me and I think it's because I know what it's like and I can't stand the thought of someone else going through it too. So once I finish the book I'm working on now, I'm going to write one about being bullied. It will be part my story and a mix of other's stories I have heard. If you know anyone that has been girl bullied and has stories they are willing to share, please have them contact me. I think it's time this epidemic found a cure and maybe I have the right words to administer it. (I've always kinda thought being a motivational speaker would be cool)

So that's it for tonight. I might start posting pieces of the book on here. Anyone interested?? Let me know.

**Rachael Marie
PS: We're working with a new name...I need a pen name that's easy to say and since there is already a Rachael Ray I can't exactly be her too.